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Defeating the Everyday Boredom

1/12/2014

1 Comment

 
If I had a defining phrase describing my childhood, it would be "I'm bored."  I said it All. The. Time.  Ask my mother.  When I moved to New York, I told myself, "If you're ever bored, it's your own damn fault."
While I can't say "I'm bored" has become my mantra here in NYC, I've definitely fallen into a pattern of sameness, and I've been chafing under these constraints I've inadvertently built.  

Let me explain.  I came here for college, where I created a grueling practice routine, which I then carried into everyday life after graduating.  EVERYTHING was focused around my art and becoming a better performer/dancer/singer/etc.  Dance classes, vocal coachings, individual work time on songs and monologues, for three+ years.  It became routine, and after such a long time, mundane.  I'd get down on myself for not taking a dance class because I saw it as a failure in my career.  These past few months have been a cycle of "failure" and self-blame and -loathing.  Not fun.  

I think subconsciously that's why my word for the year is New.  I knew I needed something (or someTHINGS) New to shake me up and realized I only have one lifetime - make the most of it.  It helped falling into a terrific new job where I get to meet a whole pool of new people, learn new and useful skills, and be constantly inspired.  

Ever since moving to NYC, I've been interested in learning aerial silks.  I'd talked myself out of taking a class by knocking my body.  I've always seen myself as a sickly sort (Victorian Frail, anyone?), and am constantly let down by my body's limitations, or MY perceived limitations of what my body can do.  I'm not sure what's changed about my thinking in recent weeks, but I found myself questioning, "Why not? You're already a better dancer than you ever thought you could be, why stop now? If you don't try, you'll never find out if your body really CAN do it or not." And a little voice inside was finally heard to be whispering incessantly, "You're stronger than you think."


I realized if I didn't grab hold and do it NOW, I never would.

So, dear readers, I took my first aerial silks and rope class - and I LOVED IT!  Yeah, I wasn't a prodigy, but I also wasn't a disaster.  I like being challenged.  Activities need to be hard enough that I must stretch myself to grow in them, but easy enough that I can see it's a worthwhile venture - it's not something I'd fail at after giving it my all. 

The teacher started class by saying she'd love to hear any aerial "resolutions" for this year. I joking said, "To be able to climb to the top!" She was kind and assured me we'd get there in a month. Dear readers, I got there about 20 minutes later.

I had such a blast, and what a workout! I needed a new outlet for my body since I've lost steam for dance at the moment, and my ankle isn't strong enough to go back to Muay Thai yet.  It's so EXCITING to do something you never thought you'd be able to do.

I guess what I'm saying is - go for it! TRY. You'll never KNOW unless you give it a whirl. 
Picture
One day, my friends. Until then, I'm enjoying my gnarly bruises
1 Comment
Nancy Menn
1/13/2014 08:50:14 am

WOW - that's an incredibly inspiring way to beat boredom!! I'm so glad you "realized I only have one lifetime - make the most of it" What a great understanding that removes preconceived limitations. Have a blast!!

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    Actress, Singer, Dancer, Food Enthusiast, Animal Lover, Writer.

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