So, tomorrow, I will get up at a reasonable hour, clean the kitchen while making breakfast, start the turkey, make the pumpkin pies, go to the market (well, maybe check out the newly opened holiday market in Columbus Circle, first, grab some mulled wine and/or cider, then hit up the farmer's market for necessary ingredients), take a look at the story that's been giving me trouble and mull some ideas on how to fix it, cursorily clean the living room, download the pics on my camera, organize said pics, organize some face painting stuff, finish making our little feast, and then freaking relax while gorging myself on delectable food with my roomie (if she's working during the day, I might also squeeze in some song practice here at the apt). See - that's normally how I like to pack my days. I need to get back into that. No time like the present to begin. And by present, I do mean - tomorrow. I got tv shows to watch in bed tonight.
I don't know what happened to gung-ho Julia, but she is sure MIA. I have felt so lazy, unmotivated, lacking any sort of drive in my life whatsoever these past few days. This is completely abnormal for me - I'm usually gogogo, doing a million and one things, constantly full of adrenaline coursing through my veins making me find a purposeful outlet so I don't go crazy. But seriously, guys, there are next to no auditions, and the season is getting to me - I want to buy lots of unnecessary things, celebrate every day, see my family, ride horses in the snow, write, and generally not care about life/my career at the moment. But as I've recently learned, just because I'm not seeing/feeling improvement/success in my endeavors at the moment doesn't mean I'm not growing. I should be doing at least 1 thing everyday that pertains to my career. I have three songs I need/want to learn. There are an endless amount of plays I could be reading. I need to take a look at my resume and probably take some unimportant credits off it. Look at agents I want to represent me. There are a myriad of things to do. And yet I find myself glued to my bed every morning, sleeping later and later. I might rouse myself in the afternoon to a sitting position, drag my laptop onto my bed, and watch some tv. In the late afternoon I might actually drag myself out of bed and over to the couch, to sit some more, putzing around on my computer, not actually getting any work done. I hate this feeling of listlessness. I was born to work, not sit around on my laurels doing absolutely nothing worthwhile. A friend was over tonight helping me with something, and it helped give me the impetus to actually write this, and think about all the things I could and should be doing. And I realized, that happens quite a lot - a friend pushing me to action. And not even because they necessarily meant to. We would just be talking, tossing ideas around, whatever. But a new perspective on things, or just a new aura to shake things up around my hot apartment, is what I need. I had a friend who did that quite often - getting me to dance classes with her, reading plays together, learning that new song. But then she moved to California. I shouldn't pin the things I do on others, but it happens quite often - and I'm sure it's not only me. It's the human condition. I notice my impulse to be more productive and a new-found desire to succeed at life when I hang out with a talented group of friendly people, like the Redeemer Musical Theatre Forum. I always leave there feeling like, "Yeah. I can do this. Now I know what I gotta do, time to go out and do it!" Aaaaand then nothing usually happens, because by the time I leave there it's usually getting on to 11pm and I take the train home and am sleepy and bla bla bla.
So, tomorrow, I will get up at a reasonable hour, clean the kitchen while making breakfast, start the turkey, make the pumpkin pies, go to the market (well, maybe check out the newly opened holiday market in Columbus Circle, first, grab some mulled wine and/or cider, then hit up the farmer's market for necessary ingredients), take a look at the story that's been giving me trouble and mull some ideas on how to fix it, cursorily clean the living room, download the pics on my camera, organize said pics, organize some face painting stuff, finish making our little feast, and then freaking relax while gorging myself on delectable food with my roomie (if she's working during the day, I might also squeeze in some song practice here at the apt). See - that's normally how I like to pack my days. I need to get back into that. No time like the present to begin. And by present, I do mean - tomorrow. I got tv shows to watch in bed tonight.
2 Comments
Bill
11/26/2012 03:57:54 pm
Well a fine pickle we are in Ollie. I can only assume that theater is like my big business career so here is my two cents.
Reply
Nancy Menn
11/28/2012 09:46:39 am
Hey, your list of things to do was 5 times more than I could do in a day. Everything takes so much longer than I expect. I am never a bundle of energy and fast moving but am more of a marathoner. Love you, Julia, and know you'll get things figured out. You normally slump after a show, and with the frenzy of the last one and the lack of auditions, this slump is normal. Catch up on your sleep and then get back on track. Your body can't sleep that much unless it needs it. So I see now why you said sad and depressed rather than mono. It was the fact of the sore throat that made me think of mono.
Reply
Leave a Reply. |
AuthorActress, Singer, Dancer, Food Enthusiast, Animal Lover, Writer. Archives
June 2017
Categories
|