Tuesday night comes. I'd bought coloured tights that afternoon, and after trying on several different outfits, I settled on my new magenta tights, gold leotard I never get to wear, black dance shorts, shimmery gold eye shadow, and a high ponytail. I go in, rock both songs, they loved my cuts and asked if I was a dancer. I said I was, and they said to come back Friday morning at 9am for the dance call. Now, as there were two full days between the initial audition and the callback, my brain got to doing it's thing of over-analyzing things. I started worrying I wasn't a "good enough" dancer - I can dance, and I'm better than I was, but I haven't been dancing since I was 3. It's all really very subjective as to what level dancer you are - different people have different ideas. I know I'm not nearly as good as some of my friends, but I'm good, and a great/dedicated/hard worker. Anyway, as I was stewing, I finally just told myself to stop worrying, whatever happens happens, it'll all work out. I saw Edwin Drood again Thursday night with a friend, and laughed as hard as ever. He gave me some words of encouragement, which was nice.
This morning comes, I get up, make Liquid Sunshine, and warm up (yaa 8am warming up - I'm such a creaky old lady!). It's blizzarding out, and I walk to Crunch, the gym where the callback is being held, dressed again in my sneakers, magenta tights, gold leotard, and black shorts. I get there early and warm up some more. Then we learn the combo - 80s aerobics style. High energy, a lot of fun, bright personality. I actually picked it up super easily and performed it fantastically. But then they made the first cut, and guess who gets the axe. Yep. This girl. It's frustrating - I saw them debating over my headshot, and then it went into the Doomed Pile. I wonder what turned them. I know I did great, and they liked me, but it was embarrassing to be in the first group of like, 7 girls that got cut. I wasn't the worst in the room. It's frustrating. Walking back to my apartment, I called home. I normally talk to my mom in these sorts of situations - she's constantly my sounding board when I'm upset. But my dad picked up and go figure, he proved just as great at listening to his youngest daughter's woes. He offered encouragement and to keep at it.
Sighing off my frustration/anger/disappointment, I figured I need to shake these feelings and focus on the positives of the whole experience.
1. I have a new rock song cut in my book.
2. I have some awesome new workout clothes :P
3. I have friends who look out for me, boost me up, and help me out.
4. I got a callback!
5. I picked up the choreo fast and wasn't thinking about the steps - I was able to focus on performing/living the dance. That's a huge step forward for me!!
6. A new group of people in the theatre world know me/my work - hopefully they'll remember me for future projects.
7. I think they had some performances May 18th and 19th - which falls over the 9th Ave Street Festival dates, the which my $600 booth fee is completely non-refundable.
8. I'm able to go hang out with my friend earlier today than anticipated.
9. I come home and my cat knows exactly how I need some love at the moment. He'll never chose someone else over me. :)
So, there it is. I'm home, listening to some Lynda Carter on this snowy day, made cookies, and am about to head uptown to meet my friend. I also found out I won a contest on the lovely Joanne's blog, Eats Well With Others. Yaa!
Also, speaking of Yaa, here are two delicious recipes I've tried and love. The juice is so far my favorite breakfast juice, and the other is a new chili recipe I tried from Pinterest.
Handful of Blueberries
2 Oranges
1 Pink Grapefruit
This is such a light, refreshing drink to have immediately in the morning. It's a nice little kickstart to the day :)
2 Tbls Olive Oil
1 large onion, chopped
1 large Sweet Potato, cubed
2 cloves Garlic, minced
1 Chipotle Pepper in Adobo sauce, chopped fine
2 tsp Cumin powder
1 tsp Chili powder
1/2 tsp Smoked Paprika
1 can Diced Tomatoes
2 C Beef or Vegetable Broth
1 or 2 cans Black Beans
*Meat - Kielbasa, ground beef, etc.
Toppings:
Cheese
Sour Cream
Chives
Avocado
Tortilla Chips
*(If the meat is already cooked, like Kielbasa, it just needs to heat up. If you're using raw meat, add it in and brown at the beginning of the whole shebang. I just threw in a bit of kielbasa we had - this recipe could definitely use more!)
4. If you have extreme will power, let it sit a few minutes to let the flavors meld. If, like me, the smell has become overpoweringly delicious, permeating your whole apartment, break out the toppings and hastily fill yourself a bowl and consume. Repeat.
This is my new favorite chili recipe - I'd been looking for one for a while and finally found it! Definitely one for the recipe book.
Enjoy!